# 12


emptiness claws at me

like a creature, scraping

through a carcass—

it craves every inch of flesh

it needs, every morsel that is left,

devour me—

just, devour

the reality:

i am running asleep.

your teeth rip me

but i do not bleed,

i am dry.

i am empty.




© AvenKain

Nod and Smile


Nod and smile.

Make the hug strong

but not close.

Keep your words casual,

make them persuade the smile.

When you’re asked out

say “yes” every time.

You must leave no windows closed

but all doors should remain locked.

Nod and smile.

Remember your “please” and your “thank you,”

for there are no excuses to not be polite.

Use the make-up

even though you hate it.

Wear bright colors,

for it better hides the grey of your heart.

Keep nodding, and smile.


And smile

© AvenKain



she drops

the pebble into the pond—

her reflection breaks

with a thunk, it is done.

she does not stay

to watch the ripples

and she does not see

how far they spread.

she does not know, no—

she does not know

what she has done—

the water ripples on

© AvenKain

Pinhole White

Photo on 2012-06-30 at 18.28 #3 copy 2

She would need to fix her smile

before someone noticed it was broken.

To remain invisible,

she would need to keep her words close.

To find the truth,

she would need to walk into the hollow night alone,

gaze up, at the stars, the moon—and realize:

It’ll all be okay.

She will find it.


© AvenKain

I can hear the cicadas sing

13263698_101306993624569_1964692686152212976_n copy

I walk into the shadows to see—

where no light can play its tricks,

I go forward

into the depths of darkness—

where hearts are laid bare

I bare my own,

set upon the stone

I am bleeding, and free.

I may not like what I see

but I will not close my eyes.

I will no longer stand blind, waiting, hoping, afraid.

I will walk into those fucking shadows,

and I will be—

Yes, I will breathe, anew.

Into the shadows

I will walk through.


© AvenKain




The dust settles like snow:

I will wait forever

in the stillness, the quiet, the cold,

for the wind to blow

me into pieces—

to you

© AvenKain

# 2

IMG_2167 copy


i roll over to your side of the bed,

mine feels so, too,



it’s cold.

i wonder how long it will take

to warm up


if i stay on your side,


i can be us both


and Maybe, yes, Maybe,

it won’t be

as lonely


© AvenKain


Photo on 2013-06-08 at 19.55 #2 copy

ghosts before silent

now moan and wail:

you, you break the moon.

the crescent left smirks and sneers.

I’m drowning—I’m drowning

in the dust from the crest of the moon.

shadows creep long, longer

swallowing the world,

the desolate hollow scape

here, no light does reach my face.

in darkness I can fade


in two

something new

© AvenKain